For most of my life, I’ve lived with these expectations of myself; that somehow, I had to make a name to prove my heart and change the world somehow. I knew this wasn’t where I needed to be as a human being, but it was one of those things that I understood in my head, but it always takes longer to process into my life and daily living.
We all do it - live in the past and ponder too much in future. Sometimes we are so focused on what you have to do in order to get ‘there’ that you leave the mindset and life to-be-given in this moment, in the present.
Last night, I watched Still Paintings, an evening with Rob Bell at The Viper Room on my iPad. Sadly, I found out about it only yesterday morning, and being in LA, I could have gone to the event, but it was already sold out (to no surprise). Not to say too much, but the words I heard were renewing my mind and heart, and canceling out all those expectations.
I learned if I continued to live in expectation, not being able to live up to them, then in the end, I would be miserable. And this is not what God has given us. He has given us the present, this moment, to live in wonder.
Just like a child, I don’t want to have to worry about the future or what I must do to get to the unrealistic places think I should get to. This scripture always comes back to me:
“Seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness, and all the rest will be added unto you.”
Yes, I do need to work hard on the things in the present, and simply dream and be inspired for what my life projects need to become, but I don’t need to worry about my circumstances, and then live in regret. This culture we live in truly breaks your soul with the expectations it lays on us all. It’s unhealthy, and not something God wants to give us.
He wants to simply give Himself to you - His love, awe, mystery, excitement, passion, joy, peace, wisdom; the list goes on and on.
We were created to create, to live in life, not death, and to rejoice in the present, seeing all the beauty around us and simply enjoying every breath.
Live in wonder. That’s what it’s all about. And that’s why I’ve renamed this blog, ‘Live in Wonder’, because that is who I am becoming - a man who lives in the wonder of the present beauty of life and all the blessings around me that bring such joy. That’s what it means to have eternal life.